Toward more Texasesque speech or “All y’all are fixin’ to run screamin’”

Y’all.

It’s a part of Texas speech. Actually, it’s pan-Southern. Go anywhere in the American South and Texas and you will hear “y’all.”

We Texans and Southerners have taken a lot of heat for using “y’all.” I got hollered at by a college professor for using it in class.
“Educated people do not use ‘y’all,’” he snapped.
“Educated people also don’t sound like geese flying south for the winter,” I said, sans Texas accent, in response to his nasal, Midwest accent.

I can feel the heat right now from all y’all who are from north of the Mason-Dixon line. I’m sorry if I’ve offended you, but he had it coming. He honked like a goose every time he opened his mouth. And he was in Texas. When in Rome, do as the Romans. And when in Texas…reeeee-lax, would ya?

I’d like to believe that “y’all” is original to these parts, but it isn’t. It’s not even American.

It’s Scottish. At least, I think it is.

Years ago, I worked with an American bagpipe band. We traveled to Glasgow, Scotland for New Year’s Eve 2001 (Hogmanay is what the Scots call it) on a trip for the band and its fans. We were standing on Argyle Street when a woman approached one of our Families about being careful of pickpockets.

“Y’all might want tae pay mind to yeer luggage,” she said in a thick brogue. “Y’all will get picked clean.”

The Texans in the tour group stood there, open-mouthed. There it was: the proof that “y’all” originated from somewhere other than Texas and the American South.

In Texas, we talk a lot about our Spanish and French heritage. Czech, German and Polish settlements are here. But look at the names of some of the towns around here and you’ll see a definite “plaidness” about the place. McGregor, Hamilton, McKinney, Anderson, Henderson—even Killeen—reflect a Celtic ethnicity. Our trip to Scotland provided us the possible linguistic missing link to Texas speech.

By the way, that’s “Celtic” with a “k” sound, not an “s.” “Celtic” with an “s” is a basketball team.
The plural of “y’all” is “all y’all.” Just thought you’d want to know.

Now, let us address the phrase “fixin’ to.” I know that drives some of y’all bug nuts crazy, but all y’all hear me out.

“Fixin’ to” is our way of putting verbal flip-flop sandals on the phrase “preparing to.” We don’t mean any harm in using it; we’re just dialing down the tone of formality. Using a less gussied up phraseology in no way indicates a lack of education. And if y’all keep harping at us about it, we’re going to make an extra special effort to use it as often as humanly possible just to watch you run screaming north over the Red River.

Let us look at the myriad of ways “fixin’ to” is used:
“I’m fixin’ to go to the store.” Translation: “I am preparing to go to the store,” or “I am about to go to the store.”
“I’m fixin’ to call the doctor.” Translation: “I am preparing to call a physician,” or “I am about to call a physician.”
“I’m fixin’ to fix dinner.” Translation: “I am preparing to cook dinner,” or “I am about to cook dinner.”

While we are on the subject of meals, I must address the regionality of dinner versus supper. In some areas, “dinner” means lunch and “supper” refers to the evening meal. I personally use “dinner” and “supper” to indicate the evening meal, since “lunch” means lunch.
Yep. I’m with you. It’s confusing to me, and I’m from Texas.